chunchangzai 的博客

追梦者的踪迹

日志

关于我

天戈

文章分类

如此丈夫们（笑话）

2018-10-08 07:23:21| 分类：幽默、谚语 | 标签： |举报 |字号大中小订阅

下载LOFTER 我的照片书 |

Husbands

From: Barbara Meyer, Matt，and Paul

Bookseller conducting a market survey asked a woman,
“Which book has helped you most in your life?”
The woman replied, “My husband’s check book!!”
      ******
A prospective husband in a book store “Do you have a book
called ‘Husband – the Master of the House?’"
Sales girl: “Sir, fiction and comics are on the 1st floor!”
       ******
Someone asked an old man: “Even after 70 years, you still call
your wife – darling, honey, luv. What’s the secret?"
Old man: “I forgot her name and I’m scared to ask her."
       ******
Pharmacist to customer: “Sir, please understand, to buy an
anti-depression pill, you need a proper prescription.
Simply showing your marriage certificate and your wife’s picture is not
enough!
       ******
For MEN and WOMEN with a bit of humor?
A man was granted two wishes by God.
He asked for the best drink & the best woman ever.
Next moment he got mineral water & Mother Teresa.
       ******
There are 3 kinds of men in this world. Some remain single
and make wonders happen. Some have girlfriends and see
wonders happen.
The rest get married and wonder what happened!
       ******
Wives are magicians. They can change anything into an argument.
       ******
COOL MESSAGE BY A WIFE: Dear Mother-in-law,
Don't teach me how to handle my children. I am living with
one of yours and he needs a lot of improvement!
       ******
When a married man says, I WILL THINK ABOUT IT - what he really means
is that he doesn't know his wife's opinion yet.

      ******

评论这张

转发至微博

阅读(73)| 评论(0)

历史上的今天

this.p={  m:2,
              b:2,
              loftPermalink:'',
              id:'fks_084069092087082068081086087075072087080064093084094067093086',
              blogTitle:'如此丈夫们 （笑话）',
              blogAbstract:'<div\><br\></div\><div\><div style=\"align-items: flex-start; display: flex; padding: 20px 0px 8px 64px; color: rgb(32, 33, 36); font-family: Roboto, RobotoDraft, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: medium;\"   \><div\><div style=\"background-image: inherit; background-size: inherit; background-repeat: inherit; background-attachment: inherit; background-origin: inherit; background-clip: inherit; background-color: transparent; border-right: inherit; color: rgb(34, 34, 34); font-family: inherit; font-size: 1.375rem; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; line-height: 28px;\"   \><h2  \>Husbands</h2\><span   style=\"display: inline-flex; align-items: center; flex-wrap: wrap; min-height: 28px; vertical-align: bottom;\"   \><div  \></div\></span\></div\></div\></div\></div\>',
              blogTag:'',
              blogUrl:'blog/static/11392809020189871814522',
              isPublished:1,
              istop:false,
              type:0,
              modifyTime:1538954601766,
              publishTime:1538954601711,
              permalink:'blog/static/11392809020189871814522',
              commentCount:0,
              mainCommentCount:0,
              recommendCount:0,
              bsrk:-100,
              publisherId:0,
              recomBlogHome:false,
              currentRecomBlog:false,
              attachmentsFileIds:[],
              vote:{},
              groupInfo:{},
              friendstatus:'none',
              followstatus:'unFollow',
              pubSucc:'',
              visitorProvince:'',
              visitorCity:'',
              visitorNewUser:false,
              postAddInfo:{},
              mset:'000',
              mcon:'',
              srk:-100,
              remindgoodnightblog:false,
              isBlackVisitor:false,
              isShowYodaoAd:true,
              hostIntro:'',
              hmcon:'1',
              selfRecomBlogCount:'0',
              lofter_single:'<iframe width="140" height="560" style="overflow:hidden;" src="http://www.lofter.com/mailEntry.do?blogad=1&blog" frameBorder="0"></iframe>'
            }

{list a as x}
    {if !!x}
    <div class="iblock nbw-fce nbw-f40">
      <a class="fc03 noul" target="_blank" hidefocus="true" href="http://blog.163.com/${x.visitorName}/">
      {if x.visitorName==visitor.userName}
      <img alt="${x.visitorNickname|escape}" onerror="this.src=location.f40" class="cwd bdwa bdc0" src="${fn1(x.visitorName)}&r=${visitor.imageUpdateTime}"/>
      {else}
      <img alt="${x.visitorNickname|escape}" onerror="this.src=location.f40" class="cwd bdwa bdc0" src="${fn1(x.visitorName)}"/>
      {/if}
      </a>
      <div class="cwd vname thide">
        {if x.moveFrom=='wap'}
          <a class="noul pnt" target="_blank" href="http://blog.163.com/services/wapblog.html?frompersonalbloghome"><span title="来自网易手机博客" class="iblock wapIcon"> </span></a>
        {elseif x.moveFrom=='iphone'}
          <a class="noul pnt" target="_blank"><span title="来自iPhone客户端" class="iblock iphoneIcon"> </span></a>
        {elseif x.moveFrom=='android'}
          <a class="noul pnt" target="_blank"><span title="来自Android客户端" class="iblock androidIcon"> </span></a>
        {elseif x.moveFrom=='mobile'}
          <a class="noul pnt" target="_blank" href="http://blog.163.com/services/emsblog.html?frompersonalbloghome"><span title="来自网易短信写博" class="iblock wapIcon"> </span></a>
        {/if}
        <a class="fc03 m2a"  target="_blank" hidefocus="true" href="http://blog.163.com/${x.visitorName}/">
          ${fn(x.visitorNickname,8)|escape}
        </a>
      </div>
    </div>
    {/if}
    {/list}

<#--最新日志，群博日志--> <#--推荐日志-->

<p class="fc06">推荐过这篇日志的人：</p>
    <div>
      {list a as x}
      {if !!x}
      <div class="iblock nbw-fce nbw-f40">
        <a class="fc03 noul" target="_blank" hidefocus="true" href="http://blog.163.com/${x.recommenderName}/">
        <img alt="${x.recommenderNickname|escape}" onerror="this.src=location.f40" class="cwd bdwa bdc0" src="${fn1(x.recommenderName)}"/>
        </a>
        <div class="cwd thide">
          <a class="fc03 m2a" target="_blank" hidefocus="true" href="http://blog.163.com/${x.recommenderName}/">
            ${fn(x.recommenderNickname,6)|escape}
          </a>
        </div>
      </div>
      {/if}
      {/list}
    </div>
    {if !!b&&b.length>0}
    <p  class="fc06">他们还推荐了：</p>
    <ul>
    {list b as y}
      {if !!y}
        <li class="rrb"><span class="iblock">·</span><a class="fc03 m2a" target="_blank" href="http://blog.163.com/${y.recommendBlogPermalink}/?from=blog/static/11392809020189871814522">${y.recommendBlogTitle|escape}</a></li>
      {/if}
    {/list}
    </ul>
    {/if}

<#--引用记录--> <#--博主推荐--> <#--随机阅读--> <#--首页推荐--> <#--历史上的今天--> <#--被推荐日志--> <#--上一篇，下一篇--> <#-- 热度 -->

{list a as x}
    {if !!x}
    <div class="hotItem iblock nbw-fce nbw-f40">
      <a class="fc03 noul" target="_blank" hidefocus="true" href="http://blog.163.com/${x.publisherUsername}/">
      {if x.publisherUsername==visitor.userName}
      <img alt="${x.publisherNickname|escape}" onerror="this.src=location.f40" class="cwd bdwa bdc0" src="${fn1(x.publisherUsername)}&r=${visitor.imageUpdateTime}"/>
      {else}
      <img alt="${x.publisherNickname|escape}" onerror="this.src=location.f40" class="cwd bdwa bdc0" src="${fn1(x.publisherUsername)}"/>
      {/if}
      </a>
      <div class="cwd vname thide">
        <a class="fc03 m2a"  target="_blank" hidefocus="true" href="http://blog.163.com/${x.publisherUsername}/">
          ${fn(x.publisherNickname,8)|escape}
        </a>
      </div>
      <a class="f-myLikeIcons hottype {if x.type==1} js-liketype{elseif x.type==2} js-reblogtype{elseif x.type==3} js-sharetype{else}{/if}" target="_blank" hidefocus="true" href="http://blog.163.com/${x.publisherUsername}/"> </a>
    </div>
    {/if}
    {/list}

<#-- 网易新闻广告 --> <#--右边模块结构--> <#--评论模块结构--> <#--引用模块结构--> <#--博主发起的投票-->

页脚

我的照片书 - 手机博客 - 下载LOFTER APP - 订阅此博客

chunchangzai 的博客

导航

日志

如此丈夫们（笑话）

Husbands

历史上的今天

最近读者

热度

评论

页脚

chunchangzai 的博客

导航

日志

如此丈夫们 （笑话）

Husbands

历史上的今天

最近读者

热度

评论

页脚

如此丈夫们（笑话）